I’ll let you fill in the blank after you read my story.

Several weeks ago I spent one afternoon running errands. I had a long list of the usual: groceries, returns, an appointment, a stop in the garden center for pine straw mulch and lots more. It had just turned hot here in the South and so I was in and out of air conditioning all afternoon. The heat can be tiring. My last stop before heading home was our local Wal-Mart where I stopped to get a few food items, a couple cans of spray paint for a project and a six pack of impatiens for one more planter that needed filling out.

I thought it would be a quick in and out stop. I was wrong. Arriving in the parking lot around 6:15 or so, I chose a spot all the way at the end near the garden center. There is a check-out lane in that department that is always faster than the regular lanes in the food section. Strategy and forethought are keys to zipping in and out. I grabbed a buggy and began to make my selections. My first roadblock to a speedy exit was the garden center check-out lane which was inexplicably closed. Oh well, I thought, moving on. With the paint in my cart and a dash to get the strawberries, I headed for the self-check lines, the second fastest way out of Wal-Mart. To my great disappointment, they were all closed, all 14 of them.

I made a quick u-turn and headed to find the shortest line in the food section at the opposite end of the store from where I’d parked. After a fast visual survey I determined that none were shorter than six to eight people with carts loaded like it was Thanksgiving. I got in the ‘20 items or less’ line that had at least a dozen people in it. My watch told me I’d been in the store over 30 minutes already, most of it walking from one cavernous end to the other! My line was not moving fast enough. I kept glancing at other lines to see if they were faster. No speedy movement anywhere. What were all these people doing buying in bulk on a Tuesday night at 7 pm?

Finally it was my turn. I asked the girl who was ringing up my five items why all the self-check lanes were closed. “Too much theft”, she reported. She also told me this was her first day on the job. Ah, I thought, no wonder this line is so slow. “You’re doing a great job”, I told her.

Relieved to be freed from the bondage of slow lines, I hustled to my car, unloaded my sacks, walked the cart to the empty cart stall, jumped in the car and called my husband to tell him I was finally on my way home and to apologize for being so late.

Wednesday afternoon at around 1 pm I got in my car to head to the post office to sign for a registered letter. Half way there I decided it would be a good idea to have my ID just in case the postal agent needed to verify my identity. Leaning over to check my purse, I realized my wallet was not there. It must be at home, I thought, so I did a u-turn and went back. After searching the kitchen, my study, and then the car a second time I remembered the last time I had my wallet was at Wal-mart. I had a sick feeling. I phoned the store and the customer service person replied that yes, there was a wallet in the safe. I said how grateful I was for a few honest people left in the world. She replied with levity, “That doesn’t mean there is anything in it”. I hadn’t thought of that. Ten minutes later as I walked out of the store inspecting my wallet, I discovered every credit card, every greenback, every penny was still in place. Amazing. I didn’t deserve that kindness, but God in His great mercy and grace allowed some honest worker or shopper to find my wallet in the kid seat of the cart where I’d left it and turn it in unpilfered.

So I ask, was it fatigue or was it menopause or stress or a host of other distractions that plague us women? I sure can’t blame it on my kids anymore!